My gift to you this Thanksgiving, Thank you for your blessings!!

LOVE Deeply, FORGIVE Often, LAUGH Out Loud

Love one another is Jesus’ primary and most important teaching. And it can be one of the most challenging teachings to learn as well. The disciples of Jesus knew this, for they too were as flawed as we ourselves can be. In scripture, many times we are referred to as God’s Children. And like children, we should approach God and the scriptures by taking baby steps as we retrain ourselves to walk like Jesus.

^{38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.’ 39 “But I say to you, do not resist him who is evil; but whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40 “And if anyone wants to sue you, and take your shirt, let him have your coat also. 41 “And whoever shall force you to go one mile, go with him two. 42 “Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you” (Matt. 5:38-42).}

 Remember…baby steps, that all you need to do. Don’t let the big picture scare you away. Take baby steps and learn to love, absorb the violence of the world one step at a time. No one expects you to be the next Saint Francis. Just take small tiny steps in the right direction. All headed towards your Father in heaven.

When you pray, pray from your heart. Picture who you are praying for. Imagine yourself lifting them up to the Light and being transformed. Your imagination is a gift from God as well. When you pray, use the gift of imagination and visualize that person you’re praying for being healed. You’re going to be amazed how well this type of visualization works. When you pray for the world see yourself lifting the Earth up and it being filled with a golden light, transforming all the violence and making the earth a peaceful place.

When you find that you are stuck and not growing, find something to laugh about. Laughter is the greatest medicine for moving and changing energy. When you are sad or sick, lock yourself in a room and watch every silly, funny DVD you can find. Watch Charlie chaplin, Mickey Mouse, Goofy, Bernie Mac – whomever you choose. Laugh out loud and watch the negative energy move out and the positive energy move in.

If you want to find some really funny movies, try to find the movies that were popular during the last depression in this country. They are hysterical!!!! Charlie Chaplin, cooking and eating a shoe. Mickey Mouse and Goofy cooking their last bean for dinner. I’m laughing just thinking about it. That’s the way to overcome darkness. –LAUGH at it.

And like children we too need to watch our words. And to remember that our words have power.  As we approach the Holiday season let us remember to Bless each other with our words.

Embrace your Darkness (+ – :The Science of Happiness cont)

Luke, Luke, I am Your Father.  
Believe it or not, this is one of the stops on the paths to wholeness and healing.   (Embracing your Dark side) that is. 

It may be Darkness, but it’s still a part of You.
This is one of the more important steps in healing yourself.  Your Dark Side, the one you keep hidden in your closet or underneath your bed.  Take it out and walk around the block.  Get to know it.  Analyze it, find out why it’s so important it remain hidden.  What is the worst thing that could happen if anyone found out about your darkness??  Make a list of what could happen.  Analyze it and see what real evidence of danger exist. 

Darkness,  What Darkness? 
Oh, wait, uh, you don’t have a Dark Side?  Oh, pardon me.  I thought you knew, EVERY BODY HAS A DARK SIDE.  You know it’s that part of ourselves we’ve been taught to be ashamed of – its those little imperfections that you think no one knows about. 

It’s a Drag
Why drag your darkness out into the light??  This is the path to wholeness.  This is how your heal yourself and become whole.  By acknowledging your darkness and inviting this darkness to re-integrate with the rest of yourself resulting in a healed, whole self.   

Do I know you?
Any part of yourself, that you disassociate from, by denying it existence becomes like a canker sore on the end of your nose; the more your deny it’s existence, the larger it grows.  Pretty soon it’s so big, you can’t deny it’s existence any longer…to yourself, or anyone else.  And then it becomes this truly embarrassing thing when it pops and you have yuk all over your face.   When all you had to do in the first place was wash your face and apply some hydrogen peroxide.  First acknowledge the darkness, then you can best address how to treat it.

The Science of Happiness : – D

Wow!  I can’t believe I didn’t think of this sooner.  The number one book I recommend to empower yourself to discover happiness is:  Louis Hays’ You can heal your life. 

In this book, Louis Hay teaches how your Words Have Power.  If you want to change your life all you need to do is Use Your Word in positive affirmations.  It really works.  It is definitely good for de-stressing.  Since much of the stress we experienced is in how we perceive the stress.  A positive affirmation can help us dial down the stress and recognize what a beautiful day we have to enjoy.  Here is an affirmation made for just that purpose.  “All is well”.  Being from a family where anxiety runs through our blood much in the same way, good looks and money run through Paris Hilton’s.  Positive Affirmations are a great tool for getting a handle on anxiety. 

Here is a great quote from Louis Hays; “The Universe Totally Supports Us in Every Thought We Choose to Think and Believe.  Put another way, our subconscious mind accepts whatever we choose to believe.  They both mean that what I believe about myself and about life becomes true for me. What you choose to think about yourself and about life becomes true for you.  And we have unlimited choices about what we can think.

When we know this, then it makes sense to choose “Everyone is always helpful.” rather than “People are out to get me”.”

In my own life, I always reached for these kind of books, that taught me how to change my life for the better…but I never read the books – in my immaturity.  The books would just sit on my book shelf as thought I would assimilate their contents through osmosis. 

Now the mature self that I am.  Not only buys the books, but takes the time to read them as well and put the contents to practice.  The Universe is always offering us a way out of the maze of stress we created for ourselves, we just need to recognize it for what it is and follow the path. 

Sounds too simple, doesn’t it.  Yes, it does.  But it’s more difficult to put into practice than one would think.     Changing your thought patterns is much more daunting a task than one would guess.  Changing the way you think requires some practice, some diligence, every day. 

Have you ever tried to quiet that incessant voice in your head??  That rattles on and on??  Do you know what that voice is? 

You can quiet that voice, if you want to.  But it will require some meditation and slowing down of your mind. 

You want to know how to do this?  The easiest way I know is to enter a monastery and learn to meditate for hours on end.  But there are other ways.  I’ll let you discover them all on your own. 

I would do you a great disservice if I were to tell you the next step.  Part of joy is discovering this for yourself.  Wishing you a happy journey.

The Science of Happiness { ~ :

Well we can’t all be happy all the time.  Why not?  I dunno, it just seems to push the law of averages beyond reason. 

Why be happy?
This is just about a no-brainer.  Happy people are healthy people.  Your body functions better when you’re happy.  You sleep better when you are happy.    You’d be hard pressed to find a good reason not to be happy. 

Empower Yourself
We can choose to be happy.  This is how it works.  Make a commitment to ourselves, choose to be happy.  Commit yourself, to being happy… when choices present themselves along the way, when we choose happiness, the choice is simpler. 

Someone cuts you off in traffic.  Do you have a tantrum?  Do you swear and give the finger?  No, you chose to be happy.  You don’t have time for this negative stuff.  You move on and continue humming that lovely tune with which you started off the day.  You might even want to send that car that cut you off a little blessing – so their day might turn around… you know… if they choose to be happy. 

It’s all about choice. 
Another way to easily improve your level of happiness is to Volunteer.  It just feels so good to give back.  The world needs volunteers – And being a volunteer has sooo many advantages.  Being a volunteer is very unstressful.  When you see the good your volunteerism has done, you feel good about yourself.  Sometimes, being a volunteer even offers perks.  I can’t think of a one, but I know they are out there. 

In my opinion, a really great way to give back it to be a big sister or big brother.  In a world of working Moms and absent Dads, Children need the extra attention a positive Adult role model can offer. 

Disclaimer
Note to the single Moms of the world:  You don’t have time to Volunteer.  Your kids need you.  I used to feel so guilty about not volunteering more when I was a single Mom.  That’s why I have to add this note.  I don’t want any single Moms out there feeling guilty.  Basically this rule can be applied to any parent.

The Science of Happiness ( 0 :

Largo  (very slow and broad tempo)
When considering what makes us happy.  We must ask ourselves, why do we work?  Do we work to the exclusion of all else?

Can one work with the end goal in mind to have more in life than just work?  To be a part of and contribute to a community that is either your family or a larger community to which your family is interwoven? 

If you answer is yes to these questions.  Then, you must be already considering or seeking out the right work environment for yourself. 

Whatever makes up a happy workplace, it would not be possible with out leaders who actively seek to create this kind of corporate environment. 

So the next question is this.  Can work, be successful and happy? 

To this I say…. Why the heck not? 

Why should the rules of success and happiness be mutually exclusive? 

Adagio (to be performed slowly)
It wouldn’t make any sense at all for me to pontificate on what I think a successful work environment should look like.  Let’s face it.  Those of us who are seeking this environment, already know what it should look like. 

Instead, what’s makes more sense is to talk about how or where we should create our new work environment. 

One could start in the environment where they’re already employed (Bloom where you are planted).   Slow Down and look for ways to improve your skills and look for ethical ways to aid your employer – by doing a good job.

Empower Yourself
Create a Goal:  Define what you want in your work environment.  (Without a target, you’ve got nothing to aim towards.)

Example:  My personal goal is to create my own business, where I am in control of my success, my creativity and my earnings.  In a way, it’s the American Dream all over again. 

I am not working a full time job currently.  Instead, I’m slowing creating a job for myself.  I’m going to school, refining my skills, picking up new skills to aid my ability to create for myself.  I use my writing skills often to hone them into a sharper instrument, improving my skills when ever I can. 

I started doing all this in a conscious way when I turned 50 years old.  That’s when the light went on.  It’s the perfect time to start evaluating your life and considering the success you’ve had in the past. 

If you’re like me and the past amounts to a small pile of pebbles.  And it is at this time that you realize that the things that count in life have nothing to do with your corporate success.  I don’t know how I can make this any clearer. 

Dolce (play Sweetly)
Find the things in life that give it meaning.  Keep a journal about what you discover.  Draw pictures if it makes you happy, write poetry.  Make a point of noticing nature.  Be a bird watcher.  

One thing you may not have noticed yet, to accomplish any of these things you will need to slow down.  In fact, it may make sense to tell yourself;  Take time to smell the flowers. 

Anyway, this is what I plan to do as I move through life.  Wishing you your highest good as you endeavor to be happy!

The Science of Happiness ( – :

The Overture
A new topic that’s caught my eye, after a phone conversation with a friend and after while at the Library.  Right after I got off the phone with my friend who is a financial officer at a start-up in Silicon Valley.  The conversation was one we have had often.  About how stress full her job has become.  How her assistant was just layed off and that she needed to pick-up the oh 40 or 50 hours that this corporate layoff has just left completely unmanned and her responsibility. 

Usually I try to help my friend see the trees for the forest.  I have some experience in Silicon Valley as well and am familiar with the usual gorilla techniques to squeeze more valuable time out of a perfectly good employee in exchange for some godly (or ungodly) amount of money. 

I remember working at a start-up after being offered my first six figured salaried and a $10,000.00 signing bonus.  All I had to do was be an absent parent, and spend every waking moment at work.  Being a single mother, made this task nearly impossible.  As most single parent’s would do in my place I hired a nanny.  Someone who was exceptional at managing my son, and making sure he got to bed on time and was fed dinner.  I would arrive each night only to kiss him on the forehead and bless him while he slept. 

Soon, I found myself in the lines of the unemployed (after the dot com bust in Silicon Valley).  And it took me a long time to figure out that I was one of the lucky ones.  I kept hearing horror stories about people just like my friend who were expected to pick-up a second job in addition to the one they already have.  Work around the clock.  In exchange for keeping their job. 

After a while and a few steps back, I began to see the big picture.  Corporate Capitalist greedily making their dollars grow beyond the normal returns, would pressure their start-up to produce impossible time lines, and pressure the management to do it with fewer people, fewer dollars, to insure less risk on the Venture Capitalist.  The start-up business wasn’t about creating and exploiting new technology anymore but instead on producing exceptional corporate profits. 

And the bigger picture started to take focus.  The question that stood out was clear…Was the ordinary American worker now a slave to the corporation?  If so, would the price demanded of the slave be worth the personal cost to the slaves family and the slave themselves? 

I remember when I first got a job that paid six figures.  I remember working the hours and thinking I never had time to spend the money.  Who was all the long hours and hard work serving??  Certainly not me. 

Well enough of this.  I find it exhausting just to recall the memory.  The above is just how I arrived where I am now.  Here is an article about how others are responding to the effects of overworking…  “New Movement for Slowing down”  http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/worklife/06/06/balance.slow.movement/index.html

I’m reading a new book about the Science of Happiness.  Not that I needed to read this book to find happiness.  It’s just I’m wondering if the conclusion that I’ve arrived at is similar to the conclusion that the author of the book arrives at.  I certainly agree with the solution that “The Slow Movement” projects as healing.