Didn’t anybody tell her?
Well another Day with just Dad and me together. Boy, I really have sympathy for caretakers who take care of a love one all by their self! This is not an easy job. Dad has been a challenge at times.
Didn’t anybody see?
Today, my usual self, I slept in till 11:30 am. What can I say, I love to sleep. So DS calls to check in and make sure things are running smoothly. Which they are not because I slept in too late.
Second Breakfast
I prepared Dad another Breakfast, so he could take his many pills (never on a empty stomach). Dad prepared a cereal breakfast for himself while I was asleep. So, he was having “second breakfast” as the hobbits from “Lord of the Rings” (J.R. Tolkien) would say. Dad took his pills and his insulin (I remembered this morning). And we were off to another Sunday.
Sundays on the phone to Monday,
From there I threw on my Sunday clothes (I showered the night before) and we flew to church (approx. 30 minutes late (again, my usual – for those of you who know me.)) We arrived just in time for the blessing of the Eucharist.
Monday’s on the phone to Me.
We went to a Catholic church; I’m not Catholic any longer; I go to church with my dad because the church I do belong to (Divine Science) is not available where I live. Also, I go with Dad because it makes my dad feel good to see me attend his church.
Third Breakfast
Later after church we would stop in Dunkin’ Donuts for Iced Coffee (it was over 100 degrees outside) and of course Dad wanted a donut. So now Dad had “Third Breakfast”. Not good for the blood sugar of a diabetic.
She said she’d always been a Dancer,
I left the Catholic Church after my son was born. I was sick to death of the tolerance of Pedophiles in the church. And felt that it merited action on my part since I was now a mother of a son. I am a spiritual person and after praying about leaving the church, I felt it was the right thing to do.
She worked 15 clubs a day.
The problem was finding another church that I could grow with. After moving to San Jose, CA; I started going to a different church every week. Not long after moving to San Jose, I had a powerful dream. My mom who was an excellent dream interpreter, helped me to understand it’s meaning. I believe she has passed these skills to me through her teachings and books that she gave me.
And though she though I knew the answer
I had a dream when I first moved to San Jose, CA. that I gave birth to a child who was eastern Indian and about four (4) years old.
Well I knew but I could not say.
The dream was about giving birth to a new spirituality. And the four years of age meant that it was a more evolved spirituality – as did the eastern Indian child.
And so I quit the police department,
After two years and with the help of a friend, I found a church who’s teachings I could accept. It was a good choice for me and I attended classes there and did grow spiritually. Most of my friends I made in the church itself. And leaving my church behind in California became the most difficult thing for me to do before moving here. I know that everywhere I go, I take my church with me. It’s teachings, the blessings of my friends, are embodied in myself and I cherish them. All of us are One, as we believe.
And got myself a steady job.
Anyway, back to Catholic Church. We went to the “Church of the Trees”, not its real name. We went to this church because they have a 12:30 mass. We call it the Church of the Trees because it is an older church and it has a lot of beautiful mature Trees growing all over the place. It is a stone church with many beautiful stain glass windows with the beatitudes written in colored glass. The church has a really wonderful Music Ministry which includes piano, drums, and many wonderful vocalists. My Dad and I sang along with the choir.
And though she tried her best to help me
Soon it was time to sing the “Our Father”; the parishioners extended their hands to each other while singing the “Our Father” and after wards the Priest invites everyone to share a sign of Peace with the person next to them. Soon everyone was sharing hugs or simple hand shakes, turning around and shaking hands with everyone on every side of them. Dad and I did the same, when Dad gave me a hug, he gave me a kiss on the forehead. Which I thought was sweet. And it reminded me that I was his daughter.
She could steal but she could not rob
One of the poignant memories that the Catholic Church stirs in me is the memory of the first church, the early church. I think that in some small way the service is similar to the Early church of the apostles. It could be that I think this way, because this is a teaching of the Catholic Church. It is a teaching that stuck with me. So in short, when I worship at the Catholic Church I imagine that I’m worshipping in harmony with the first church. Two different points in time worshiping as one.
Didn’t anybody tell her?
You may be saying, it sounds like you have rejoined the church? Or I thought you hated this church?
Didn’t anybody see?
Well, in truth I decided to make peace with the Church. Mostly because this year Pope Benedictus apologized to the Masses for the Churches’ tolerance of the Pedophiles and acknowledge the Church’s wrong doing. That’s what I was waiting to hear. Would it be enough? That I would have to wait and see about. Would I rejoin the church?? No, I’ve outgrown the church. God has led me to greener pastures and that is where my heart remains. Instead, I decided to allow this time I spend with my dad to accomplish three goals.
- allow me to spend valuable time with my Dad in Church;
- Make sure my dad wasn’t alone while he worshiped in church. and;
- allow the wounds of the church to heal in my heart.
Beatle Lyrics end
So that’s about it. My explanation on my perspective of the Catholic Church.
About a year ago, I went to see a psychiatrist, because I was having thoughts on suicide. I was extremely fortunate in that I found a really compassionate, good person who was also a psychiatrist. The diagnosis was depression. The treatment was psychotherapy and Prozac. It was enormously beneficial. And I learned or discovered that my depression was brought on by the death of my mother (in September’05). Mostly because I felt so bad that she died alone. All by herself. It broke my heart actually.
Now, DS will tell you that she didn’t die alone. DS was with her for two weeks in the hospital before she died due to bruising to her brain. This was true. After Mom fell down and hit her head on the way to kidney dialysis in the parking lot of the hospital, she was all alone. A stranger found her and brought her into the emergency room. I felt my mom should not have been alone. I was angry at myself for not being there. Even now this brings up tears in me. But I do feel it is healing to write about it.
I truly believe that this was Mom’s choice. This was her time to move on to a truly better place. It wasn’t any of our choices. We would have kept her around forever if we could have. Mom was in charge of the time of her death.
And so we all let Mom go. We accepted Mom’s choice. And let Mom move on to the next plane of existence.
Back to the present. Dad’s blood sugar was high. Mostly my fault because I let him eat too much food. When Dad’s blood sugar gets high, he becomes very unreasonable, irritable and mean. And he can’t do exercise, to get his blood sugar back to normal. No, that’s not happening.
Okay, Okay, I’ve learned my lesson. I must be more careful with Dad and monitoring his blood sugar.
For Lunch I made Dad an asparagus salad. Which he enjoyed and finished. I put a movie on to distract him from his grouchy self. Also, DS called and tuned into what was going on. DS called DS#2, my sister in Seattle, and asked her to call Dad to help him quiet down. DS#2 called and talked to Dad for about an hour. Dad was all mellow when he got off the phone with DS#2 and started watching the “Harry Potter” movie. Which, gratefully, he is still watching now. It’s the only reason I can be writing now.
I would like to Thank the Beatles for their use of their lyrics and to MSNBC for the use of their pics from their web site. Also, Thanks to Dunkin Donuts for the mention of their name.
Sunday, took Dad to church. A lovely service at the local Catholic Church of Divine Savior. They have a really great music ministry and a wonderful Father Carl gave the sermon. I enjoy Fr. Carl’s sermons because they are good and also because Fr. Carl is from Ireland and he usually has an interesting way of looking at things. 
Dad and I stuck to the light work, picking up Palm leaves and carrying them up to the front of the driveway (see pic to right). DBL and Brody did all the heavy work. Like mowing and repairing the screens around the pool. After wards my shirt was wet with sweat and I headed too my room for a nap. Every one seemed to wrap up their work in short order. 
TS Fay. Grandpa and Brody ordered the same dish “Fettucine Alfredo with Shrimp (on Left). DBL
Living Simply 
